"Hey, did u heard, they broke up.."
We often come across such gossips. Such shallow gossips.
Today I just wanna ask those gossipers, is this really a point of gossip? Do they ever realize what that person is going through? Do they really know what a heartbreak is like? I wonder "no". They dont.
I'll tell them what a heartbreak is.
I'll them because I know what it is.
I've felt the piercing of it right into my heart.
They think that heartbreak is just an emotional dejection.
But its more than that. Much more than that.
Love is the cause of heartbreak. Love is a feeling which cant be defined and nor does one can measure its extent and boundaries. It can only be felt. And when we talk of passionate love i.e a chemistry and compatibility between two individuals of different sexes, its amplitude even more vastens.
Passion , desires, promises , dreams , expectation , dedication and commitment are feelings which dont require an invitation. They just creep in when one one is in love. Life becomes beautiful. Like a bliss. The person starts to feel happier than ever.
But what happens next.? What happens when you get abused by a heartbreak?
When you loose someone you love, you loose the relationship, you loose the love, you loose the purpose of all your above mentioned feelings, you loose your smile, you loose your happiness, you loose yourself, you loose the need of doing those simple, stupid, idiotic, caring, things that used to bring a smile on your loved one's face. That smile which was like heroine or brown sugar to you and you were deeply addicted to it. Getting over this addiction is as difficult as swimming across atlantic.
"Zindagi pe tera mera kisi ka na zor hai,
hum sochte hain kuch vo saali sochti kuch aur hai.."
"Life is all about expecting unexpected". "Ye saali zindagi." Things never go as we want them to. Heartbreak happens, what-so-ever the reason may be. This ill fate changes us for all the rest of our coming lives. The means of our lives gets altered altogether.
Rejection hurts. It hurts like hell. It makes us feel really incomplete. The part that completed you have left by far. We feel shattered all over. We feel chocked, not even able to breathe. The pieces of broken dreams pierce into our own eyes. We get battered blue all. An ocean of sorrow, anguish and distress afflicts to engulf us deep.
Heartbreak creates a barrier between us and life. Pessimism creeps in. All is visible is darkness all around. This even prevents us from feeling and experiencing life. We dettach ourself from society and every social thing. We withdraw. We dont want anyone around.
The pain is intolerable. Really it is. So much so that it leads to a stage of depression. A deep ache erupts like a volcano. The ache longing for the past.
Our normal routine life is bound to change. We even omit the basic needs of life like food and sleep. We loose our appetite. Nights go sleepless in their thoughts. You start to face insomnia and nightmares with open eyes. We shed gallons of tears. We cry a lot. We cry so often. Eyes are always wet and red. We cant think anything else. Thoughts keep going back to our ex, to the breakup. Their face will never be off our eyes. All such questions like "What they said? What they promised? Why it all happened?" will be popping in our minds every single moment. And you feel lonely. This feeling of lonliness and emptyness is so intense that you start to believe hopeless and ultimately alcohol abuse is on the cards.
Inception to belief that you cant live without them evolves. You dont have any future and your heart being smashed into thousand pieces.
You stay stunned. Shocked, as if land slid from beneath your feet. And you not able to digest the whole situation. Denial. You dont want to accept what just happened. You deny the reality. And then, you commence suffocating due to this suffering, guilt and unbearable pain.
You regret. You regret of your shattered unfulfilled desires. As if you just woke in the middle of a beautiful dream. You regret all your emotions, love and care you invested. You regret the lashing of unspoken emotions.
Your character changes altogether. You get befog into anger, frustration, vaxation, humiliation and isolation. Everything goes hand in hand. You dont understand whats going on. Everything seems so chaotic. You ask hundred of questions to yourself for your loss and grief. Your ex left these questions for you without any answers to them.
Some people even perceive suicidal tendancies as they cant bear this pain anymore. Its fucking fatal. Yes it is.
Is heartbreak more painful than heart attack?
Yes they are. Heart attack is a pain of just a few moments. Then the person either goes unconscious or they die. But in case of heart break, its altogether different. The person dies from within as if their soul passed away. They die bit by bit. They die every passing moment. They die in installments. They cant help it. And its much more painful than a heart attack.
But its not right to give your life for such a person. Life is a bliss. A beautiful gift of nature. And anyway, they are not worth of giving life for.
But what else can we do? How to survive? How to overcome? These questions are like torture for the victim. I do have a little idea.
"They say love is just a game,
they say time can heal the pain.."
Do time really heals? Do time really relieves the soreness of the wounds? Yes it does.
Just give yourself a bit time. Forgive. I know its really hard to do. But its for your own good. I believe, Forgiveness is the best punishment ever. And it would lighten your own burden off your soul. Forgive and forget.
Get involved with friends. Spend Quality time with them.Try to have a little fun.It really helps. Find someone that would make you feel needed, appreciated and loved. Its all bollywood rubbish that love happens just once. Love is one's need. And it would happen again. You just need to give yourself a chance. An opportunity. But yes, magnitude and amplitude of this love may not be same as before. But at the end , its life and we are ought to make certain compromises. Enjoy your new life with them. Love them. Open all the closed doors and windows of your heart. Let the love , live again there.
But footprints of the person, on your heart , who trampled it will always remain.
"Wounds may heal with time,
but their marks will remain always.."